I have just experienced the most amazing reminder about how answers are given to us. It is not a voice in your head, nor a booming message from the heavens. It is life that speaks to us, talking to us all the time. Here is how it happened.

I was walking a client to his car after a coaching session which he had specifically arranged to help him find direction in his working life.  He felt stuck and totally unclear.  We had a brilliant session, very specific, one in which so much was revealed to him – surprising stuff that he was taken aback to discover. As we stood next to the car saying goodbye, a flock of twenty or more cranes flew directly overhead, so low down we simply couldn’t have not noticed them flying in a perfect arrowhead formation.

Wow! If there was any doubt in his mind that his questions had been answered, the birds were sent to sweep that doubt away. How much more confirmation could one need that he had just found the right direction?

I had had the miracle of such things happening to me so many times, but I was gobsmacked at yet another brilliant example of how life gives answers. If we will only notice, if only we will accept. But we are often so busy. We is so much chatter in our heads that most of us miss most of it.  So, if you want an answer will you stop and look around you from now on?  Stop the endless chatter of your mind, and let nature and circumstances teach you. Will you drop your disbelief? Just accept life is mystical. Revel in it! If you can, what lies ahead is a juicy, rich adventure, specially tailored for your unique needs.


There is a door. That door is marked MY DESTINY, MY PASSION. You need to find it, and the good news is that you CAN find it. And it is easier than you probably think. The trick is to pull back the curtain that hides the door. That curtain is called MY MAIN HORRIBLE LIFE CIRCUMSTANCE. Yes! You have read right.  Your main problem is a curtain, that when approached with the right mind set, can be pulled back to reveal the door to your destiny.

I discovered this by looking back on my own life path and realising that my divorce 30 years ago was THE most traumatic, challenging and difficult thing ever, but was THE turning point for me. I was left to fend for me and my children on my own – without emotional skills, money or qualifications. It was a do or die thing and the circumstances squeezed me, squeezed me tight, so tight I was forced to face the problems head on. No getting away from myself anymore!  I had to ask myself what I was going to do about my life. By deciding that I was going to make it, and make it big, I set in motion a process of mining myself and my talents.  Suddenly I was discovering all sorts of things I could do well – and delightfully – enjoy too! Suddenly I was becoming a high powered business woman, aerobics instructor, course leader, speaker and author.  I was flying, I was happy.  Yes I had daily challenges, and still many personality flaws to work on, but I also had a vision and the motivation to achieve it. My problems had become my delicious destiny. Big problems are a psycho-spiritual device to create a focus point for your life-learning. They are also a mechanism to make sure you bring forth your gifts, for your personal use, and to share with the world.

Tip:  go to a curtain in your house, close it and step back, saying to yourself my biggest problem is like this curtain. Then deliberately open the curtain saying to yourself: THROUGH MY MAIN HORRIBLE PROBLEM, I NOW FIND AND OPEN THE DOOR TO MY PASSION AND LIFE DESTINY. IT IS EASY.  If you do this, the information held in your cells will shift.  Do this often.  Involving your body in your decision is potent. Energy will start to flow and soon the right guidance will appear in your world – a soft idea floating into your mind, a friend who mentions something, a comment in a film, a hunch……


Trauma.  We all have it.  It comes through big events, or simply small ones – insignificant moments that someone else might find totally benign, but that your personality finds traumatic.  When we think of the word trauma, body injuries, emotional blocks and the like, spring to mind.  But I know for sure, can guarantee you, trauma plays out in our finances too.  Yes! not being able to pay your bills is traumatic. Not knowing whether you will have money for food  is traumatic. Not knowing that you have the affirming power of money coming in every month, makes you feel bad, very bad, about yourself. Trauma and money are partners in financial problems. Not having enough money is a painful experience that runs through your mind. Not having enough money is a painful experience that hurts your body. Not having enough money is a painful experience that blocks the illuminating energy of your Soul. Struggling with money is pain in action.

Why am I being so emphatic about this?  If you can truly acknowledge the full impact of money problem on your energetic systems, you will have aligned yourself to the real truth of the situation. That alignment will bring relief and release, and trigger a flow of energy into your body-mind.  Flowing energy is an absolute MUST to be attractive to money. So give your money life a boost. Get the law of attraction working again. Acknowledge that you might have PTMS post-traumatic-money-stress.

TIP:  when you find yourself stressing about money, stand up and start shaking your body. Start by shaking and wiggling your hands vigorously, then shake your arms – then slowly let everybody part join in, ending with vigorous shaking of the legs and finally the feet.  Be a shaking shaking body. Shake out that trauma, and feel your money life come alive!


I recently attended a brilliant talk by Collin Campbell on lucid dreaming. (As it turns out lucid dreaming wasn’t a talk on out of body experiences at night or such things, but rather lucid dreaming is dropping the veneer of the 5 senses to get to live closer to Spirit day and night.) He spoke in depth about the importance of discomfort in our lives, and how modern society with all its creature comforts, creates more and more distance between us and Soul and Spirit.  It was a good reminder for me as I am experiencing a lot of discomfort in my own life at the moment – journeying deeply with the messages that my body is sending through poor health.  What I remember especially about his talk was the three things he said were essential lucid dreaming

1.       Persistence

2.       Willlingness

3.       Patience

Best of all was his definition of willingness.  He said ‘willingness is simply saying IT IS WHAT IT IS’. How lovely!  What a fab definition of willingness! What I hear him saying is a total non-resistance to the circumstances and situations of our lives.  It is not about being feeble or weak, rather, when we accept what is happening as being perfect for us in the moment, we are WILLINGLY opening to Spirit. Non-resistance frees up energy and allows the great Life Force to flow into our world and move us to exactly where we should be!


I was having one of those days — maybe you’re familiar with them? — when I felt like a passenger on a fast, jerky subway train, holding the handrail tight just to stay standing, each turn throwing me off balance.

I gave a presentation that received a standing ovation and left the stage on top of the world. Then I read an angry email from someone and became angry myself. Following that, I did a fun on-radio interview and I was energized. A little later, I received feedback that I talked too much in a meeting and I was embarrassed and disappointed in myself… Download Article or read more Peter Bregman Stuff




“Healthy femininity trusts the mystical forces of Life is enough to bring about all goals. It operates from experiencing the present moment and responds with instinctive knowingness and caring for all. It is inclusive in a non invasive way and waits on the intelligence of love to move it. It is receptive, allowing all that is needed to be given it to bring about new forms in life.”


A well feminine voice is calling us all – in our own life, and on the planet! Over the last two thousand years, or more, the masculine energy in its corrupted form has governed humanity – hence the state of the planet. Harmonious living with nature is virtually non-existence, and rule of force, wars, suppression of women, abuse, violence and dictatorship have ruled. Corrupt male energies have ruled the earth with a stranglehold on politics, business and schooling, affecting all aspects of society.

Worse still, many women of today, especially in business, have subliminally taken on board masculine attributes and lost themselves in the process. Business research shows masculine qualities are behaviours attributed to success – even women think that!  Things are changing thankfully, and men and women are awakening, and returning, to their feminine force (yes men have a feminine force).  In order for this to happen in a big way, (which is what the world needs) polarised masculinity (present in both men and women) needs to move back into balance with the feminine, and through this, become function as planned.

image001Both these energies are present in all of us, however as a general rule, men’s primary energy is masculine, and women’s is feminine.  This truth is expressed in the yin-yang symbol, where both have a little dot of the opposite colour

When the masculine and feminine are not in balanced expression and cooperation with each other, natural checks and balances are not active. Both aspects then pull apart and polarise, falling out of their natural modes of operating and becoming corrupt in their essence and action.



Thrusting forward, driving and making things happen

Initiating and controlling

A foundation and anchor and a backbone


Thinking, planning and analysing to know what’s happening

Concerned with the outer


Head connected

Competitive and focussed on tasks, doing

Works with the ‘I’ – the role and function of the individual and differentiation


Overpowering and selfish and ruthless

Forceful, aggressive and brutal


Rigid and constricting

Undeviating and unbending

Unable to express feelings and emotions or acknowledge or even allow other’s feelings

Busy to a point of never taking time to go inwards

Over analytical, logical to the exclusion of all else

Coldly disconnected from the impact of their actions on others


Provides an anchor, form and foundation to the expansive creative force of the feminine, bringing focus and manifestation. It brings healthy individuation, creating borders and structure, and forward movement. (we all need that!) The warrior male energies protect and go into the world to make an impact. It is quietly confident, holding its own and keeping its centre in the face of different opinions or conflict. From this description we can see how important this energy is for both men and women. Doing, impacting and thinking are its key notes.



Restful and patient and trusting

Heart connected


Holding the creative potential



Expanding, organic growth and inspiring vision

Collaborating and patient


Happy to work from the present moment


Works with the WE


Manipulative and scheming

Inert and wimpish and vague

Scattered and disorganised and doesn’t get things done


Confused and stuck

Governed by what others think

Over emotional to a point of being immobilised

Self sacrificing

Victim mode


Equally as strong but in a still way, healthy femininity knows that all is very well in the world, and that trusting the mystical forces of life is enough to bring about all goals. It operates from experiencing the present moment and responds with instinctive knowingness and caring for all. It is inclusive in a non invasive way and waits on the intelligence of love to move it as it refers to the inner world. It is receptive, allowing all that is needed to be given it to bring about new forms in life.  Allowing, feeling and emergence are its key notes.


1.       Monitor your thinking and move away from conditioned idea that you need to take action in order to heal. That is a stuck masculine approach.

2.       Use the healing power of feminine energy. By simply becoming aware of what mode is active within you moment by moment. That is enough to activate a natural success system that lives within you – and knows how to bring you to balance – if you will just allow it. This silent inner leader will help you make intuitive steps to bring your masculine and feminine energies into balance. Your only role is to know the characteristics of each and acknowledge which is operating when.

3.       It’s important to allow yourself to move fluidly between the masculine and feminine energies as guided by the circumstances. For example if you standing at the hospital admissions with a very sick child and getting to see a doctor is taking too long, that’s the time for masculine driving energy to become active and push things to happen. If however you partner has just had bad news, that’s the time for feminine deep quiet listening and loving support and caring to take over. In this way healthy masculine and feminine energies ask us to be fluid enough to dance between the two as the situation dictates. The more you work in this way, the more automatic and empowered it will become.